Mourning Loss of Self: Your Friends
5/12/2009
by vianesa
Ok, so you now have a beautiful bundle of joy. Why not invite a girlfriend over to enjoy the event with you?
Why do new moms desert their old friends?
This is truly a casualty. I've read time and time again how moms feel as though they are all alone, no one to identify with, and feeling like their old self is gone. Blah, blah, blah...I've got a news flash: call your girlfriends!
From experience, I can say that my girlfriends and I don't talk as much as I would like. Granted, we are all busy, and have full plates, but they, and I need to do a better job of keeping in touch. After a tough week, talking to them is like a dose of medicine: I feel much better. I love my girlfriends, but I can also tell you that motherhood changes friendship. For one, you just don't have the time to reach out, and if your girlfriends don't have children, sometimes the conversations can feel forced. If relationships are not nurtured, they don't grow. Unfortunately, this happens in too many cases.
I try to make a point of calling a different girlfriend each week. Even if I don't get to talk with them, they know I thought about them and love them. Why not do the same?
With everything going on today, don't ever feel as though you are alone. Chances are, your girlfriend may have gone through the same thing you have, and can help you through the transition to motherhood. Count on them...they have tremendous power!
Be well!
VV
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